The Billiken's Bluff

Pundits from both sides of the political spectrum are calling for Donald Rumsfeld to resign from his post as Secretary of Defense. Today Rumsfeld came under fire for yet another indiscretion. Rather than individually sign each of the letters of condolence sent to the families of the more than 1,200 soldiers killed in Iraq, Rumsfeld has had a machine affix his name to those letters.

Sen. Jack Reed (D-R.I.), a West Point graduate, said Rumsfeld’s failure to sign letters displayed “his lack of leadership styles that are appropriate for the military.”

But who should replace Rumsfeld? Who has the wherewithal to lead troops into battle? Who has a mastery of strategical positioning? And most importantly who displays those ‘leadership styles’ so vital to the military? The Bluff has always strived to be a progressive-minded, forward-thinking, pseudo-journalistic, occasionally humorous weblog, so in keeping with that spirit The Bluff would like to nominate the New England Patriot’s head coach, Bill Belichick for Secretary of Defense.



Of course Belichick would not abandon his men in thick of the NFL playoff race, no true leader would. Rumsfeld should stay on until after the Iraqi Presidential elections (precariously) take place at the end of January, which quite conveniently coincides with the Super Bowl. Think of the P.R. coup for the Bush administration. George W. Bush, an avid football fan, can attend the Super Bowl and take the stage alongside Belichick during the post-game press conference. Smiles, handshakes, hugs, cameras flashing. Belichick leads the Patriots to their 3rd NFL championship in 4 years, and announces while holding aloft The Vince Lombardi trophy that, yes, he will accept President Bush’s nomination for Secretary of Defense.

Belichick is no cretin; he graduated cum laude with a B.S. in Economics from Wesleyan, no slouch of a school. He has always been regarded as one of the NFL’s premier defensive strategists in the game. That reputation has been earned over a 25-year NFL coaching career that has included Super Bowl titles as the defensive architect of the New York Giants in 1986 and 1990 and a conference championship as the assistant head coach and defensive assistant for the Patriots in 1996. When he returned to the Patriots in 2000, he followed a sound architectural plan, fortifying the foundation of the roster with team-oriented free agents who would support his overall team philosophy. The man simply gets results. His team has won 2 out of the last 3 Super Bowls. They have compiled a record of 29 wins and only 3 losses over the past two years. Currently they are 12-1 heading into tonight’s Monday Night Football match up against the Dolphins.

Belichick’s players show unquestioned loyalty to their commander-in-chief. He has led them into unforgiving terrain (think January 2003 snowy AFC championship against the Raiders) and they have emerged victorious. He is prepared for every contingency. Belichick would not have left any room for ‘miscalculations’ while securing Iraq after our initial shocking and awing. All Belichick does is calculate.

“You go to war with the army you have, not the army you want,” lamented Rumsfeld.

Belichick knows how to lead his troops into battle. He is a tactical master of both offensive and defensive strategy. He is a realist and with a nod to his predecessor, he understands that you go to war with the army you have. When Ty Law went down with injury, a lesser coach might have called Angie Harmon to see if Jason Sehorn knees still worked. Instead Belichick realized that a corner back is nothing more than a receiver who can’t catch the ball. Thinking outside the proverbial box, Belichick switched Troy Brown, one of his trusted veteran wide receivers, and put him on the other side of the ball in the defensive secondary. Troy Brown has flourished in his new role, and now (with a receiver’s sure hands) he leads the Patriots in interceptions. He’s not only dealing with the army he went to war with, he’s excelling with it. We need this quality of improvisation in our top military brass.

Belichick realizes that you go about getting the army you want in the off-season. As I said he doesn’t complain about or make excuses for key injuries during the war that is the NFL season. But immediately after the season is over he takes stock of his inventory of players. He analyzes the free agents available and prepares for April's NFL Draft. There is no off-season for Belichick.

He has been known to shun high price-tag veterans. The man is no sentimentalist, no bleeding-heart liberal (which as N. Dot pointed out is jus’ naat feasbul when it comes to our nation’s security interests). When Patriots veteran safety Lawyer Milloy demanded a costly contract extension, Belichick sent him packing to Buffalo. He is a fiscal realist. He knows that for every luxury-item Terrell Owens that you sign there will be that much less money to build the rest of the unit. He has worked with the stringent NFL salary cap for a quarter century. Deficit spending isn’t even in his playbook. But when the right new technology presents itself, like say a Corey Dillon, he is not afraid to pay for it, but only if it fits within the framework of his over-all team philosophy.

So for example, if after analyzing countless hours of game footage, Belichick decided that a Missile Defense Shield was in the interest of our nation’s security he would not hesitate to go out and get that Shield, but only after he shopped around for the best price and knocked a few billion off that price tag. And what would Belichick have to say if there was an $85 million failed missile test launch that occured under his watch? Well he would send the personnel responsible for the failure to some place a helluva lot colder than Buffalo.

And you better believe Belichick would have a thing or two to say about the need for proper armor for his soldiers. In Belichick’s 25 years of coaching experience, EVERY single one of his players has been supplied with the proper accouterments. Every Belichick player has been equipped with a helmet, shoulder pads, jock strap, and mouth piece. He wouldn’t lead his troops into battle any other way.

I realize that the position of Secretary of Defense requires a military background that some people may feel Belichick lacks. But the nomination of Belichick is not quite as outlandish as it may sound. George W. Bush had no direct experience with national politics when he was elected president in 2000. Arnold Schwarzenegger had no political experience whatsoever and is now governing the fifth largest economy in the world. Belichick has plenty of exposure on the national stage and has done nothing but win.

Think outside the box.