The Billiken's Bluff

On Tuesday, I went on an interview for a potentially highly-lucrative sales position. They gave me the Boiler Room Pitch. Actually, the 21- year old who interviewed me referenced the film Boiler Room during the interview. He said that atmosphere in the office was very much like Boiler Room, although he assured me that everything was on the Up & Up.



He asked me: "How many 21-year olds do you know who own their own home?"

Me: "None that I can think of."

He: "Well I own my own home. Now you know ONE."

Basically, I got served and I was sold. I was a believer ready to pound the phones, to Act As If, and Always Be Closing; that is until I went on their website and read this:

“We are licensed in the following states:New York, Connecticut, Masachusts and Florida.”

Now I never expected my B.A. in English & American Lit. to amount to much. Both during casual conversations and on professional interviews I backpedal, attempting to justify 4 years at NYU scouring through text and searching for zeugmas. I try to downplay my bookishness, and appear eager and willing to be a corporate salary man. But I simply could not condone that chop-shopped spelling of the great state of Massachusetts. My four years of higher education were not all for naught.

My sojourn at this Boiler Room lasted all of one day. Once again I'm back on the market, a free agent waiting to be signed by the right employer. I’ll be posting a new-fangled resume here on Billiken sometime tomorrow. Prospective employers, be on the look out.